I was a little bit excited on Monday because last week, I had come across a position with Frederick County Public Schools that I was highly interested in. It was a secretary for Whittier Elementary School. It was a dollar above what I am making now. It was 37 hours/week as opposed to my normal 50 plus three hours of daily travel time. It was 6 miles from my front door. I wouldn’t have to be there until 8. Pure Bliss my brain was telling me. Monday was the deadline for applications, resumes and a TYPING TEST. Ha! 55wpm, no problem!
Sunday night, Chris and I revamped my cover letter and did a little bit of work on my resume to tailor it more to that position. Before we re did the resume, it was more geared toward an environmental construction position. BLECH. Gotta get out! Anyway, it was done, perfect and ready to go.
I got my cover letter, application and resume submitted on Monday before the 4 PM deadline. Chris and I left D.C. around 2, so we could make it to Frederick by 4 for me to take the TYPING TEST.
We arrived there around 3:30. Excellent. I sat in the waiting room and waited my turn. I began to get a bit nervous because I don’t type well under pressure. I hate that! My turn came around and I sat at the chair a bit uneasy as the lady explained to me what I needed to do. The girl before me scored 29 wpm with 20 errors. Oh boy, this may be a doozie. I began to type furiously; I caught a few mistakes and fixed them. Typing, Typing, Typing….DING! Times Up! …………and the result…………..53.7 wpm, with 2 errors.
53.7
Because I was 1.3 wpm out of the speed and accuracy they wanted, HR threw my perfect resume, cover letter and application away without even looking at it. I was devastated.
1.3 wpm.
Now, here is my problem with these government jobs. I have SO MUCH office experience, it’s not even funny. I run a construction office with a bunch of power trippin, disorganized men. And miraculously, the office runs smoothly with only minor hiccups here and there. BUT, because I missed their goal of 55 wpm by 1.3 wpm, I am automatically disqualified for the position. Now, let’s just say that the person behind me is an 18 year old fresh out of high school gossip queen who’s life revolves around text messaging and IMing, so her typing speed is that of a cougar, yet this person has NO office management experience. This person may get a job offer because she could type 55 wpm under pressure, even though this person has NO experience. Then there is me. I miss it by 1.3 wpm, and I ooze office management and supervisory skills, yet my resume is being recycled into toilet paper as we speak. HOW does this make any sense and HOW is this fair? Ugh.
I was really really discouraged because this job search has been going on for almost a year with no luck. I think God is trying to tell me something. And I KNOW His timing is PERFECT. I KNOW that we are put through trials at times, but seriously you guys, I’m FALLING APART here. I am beyond burnt out, I am beyond tired. Let me share with you just how bad my sleeping patterns have become. I am so restless at night, that I have LITERALLY worn holes in the sheets and pillow case on my side of the bed. Yes, you read that right. Holes are worn in to my sheets. Now, please if you know anyone else, anyone at all, who has experienced the same thing…elaborate so I know that I am not THAT FAR GONE. LOL, it’s pretty funny, but not so funny all at the same time.
I really did break down to God last week. I was a sobbing mess in my bathroom for at least a half hour. But I needed that. I needed to pour my heart out. He knows my heart, but I need to physically let it all out to Him. I have been better since then mentally, but I almost have the attitude of not caring anymore. I really am trying to care about my work, but for many reasons, I just cannot and you girls that have been with me through all of this know many of those reasons already. I KNOW that the Lord wants me to truly be dedicated to my work when I am here, but I just can’t. I can’t justify why I am here, in the presence of anger and fighting and political crap that isn’t going to make or break the system, it’s just a bunch of people complaining because that is what we do. We complain. I complain. A lot. About my lifestyle and why I can’t keep this going. Chris told me last night that it is really beginning to affect him too.
I know that God has a plan, I know that. I know that I need to be patient and trust Him; and I do, but everyday gets harder and harder to keep motivated and keep my eyes open.
I want to serve my church and work on my scrapbooks and workout and enjoy my free time. More importantly, I want to spend more time with God. I want to become a better Woman for God, Wife for God, and future Mother for God. I hope that a change is coming soon. I’m really fine, it’s just what is on my heart today and I wanted to share.
I hope you all have a wonderful day and don’t forget that all of you are in my daily thoughts and prayers.
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Thursday, August 09, 2007
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15 comments:
I just wanted to say thank you for sharing your heart on this. I can't say that I've worn holes in my sheets, I basically fall into bed and right to sleep every night out of exhaustion of my own. I do know, however, that this season is not forever, and that you are doing the right thing to hang on and keep going. God does know your heart, and it's a great thing that you tell Him out loud how you feel too. He doesn't miss a single thing, He is faithful, and He will see you through this... after you learn what He is trying to teach you here. I'm in a similar place, and the lesson for both of us (at the very least) is to "Be still." He is God. He is sovereign, and nothing... NOTHING escapes His notice.
I am praying for you, my friend.
Sorry about the job situation!
Have you tried posting your resume on the online job sites? I don't know if it's industry-specific or what, but every single time I update my resume on Monster I get a SLEW of calls ... most crap, but a few decent ones in between. Just a thought.
You'll find something better. Really. Hang in there.
oh good grief!! that sucks! isn't it crazy that the smallest of criteria which shouldn't matter in the grand scheme can do that to you? I do pray that something wonderful will come your way. I took have been in the job hunt for nearly a year, but to no avail. However fresh out of college it took me more than a year to get a "real job" and it was a joke. I've not at all had luck in the career department. I went for a super motivated, driven person with ideas and enthusiasm to this: "get me thru the next 8 hours and give me a paycheck".
Good luck on the continued search!
I agree with Cathy-GET. YOUR. RESUME. OUT!!! Put it up on Hotjobs, Monster, careerbuilder--let people know you are looking. You can also put the resume as private so your current employer can't see it. You need to get out of this current job and getting your resume up will be one step closer to getting you out of there.
Stay strong!
Aww, I'm so sorry. Had it been one day earlier I would have sayd to try again and again, send them your resume again and again, being persistent pays off. There's even a scripture about it, I'm sure you'll run into it in your Proverbs study. =) Keep an eye out on other local schools, I've got 3 local school corps in my favorites constantly checking up on their employment page. I too have an application out for an elementary school secretary, isnt that funny! I havent heard anything and highly doubt I will, but every connection I can make gets me a little closer. If you were in my area you could apply to the same job and totally kick my butt.
You are in my prayers.
Have a lovely day
That's awful! I hate when people are hiring for positions and make things so black and white like that. My dad is having trouble getting a position even though he has 20+ years experience with the same title...just becasue he doesn't have a college degree.
It's not fair and I'm sure it's pretty devastating especially since it seemed like that opening fit in so perfectly with your life. I'm sure that it felt like God was finally handing you something better and when it didn't pan out it had to be incredibly disappointing. I guess you just have to keep waiting and keep turning to God. I know how hard it is though...I'm strugling with that myself. I hope that I can get some strength from listening to your journey. Because, honestly, you're doing a much better job than I am right now. Keep your head up girl!
I'm so sorry about the bad job search luck. It's ridiculous that they're willing to overlook you becuase of 1.3 WPM. It's their loss and it just means you aren't supposed to be there. I know how frustrating it can be. Right out of college I couldn't get an interview to save my life. Everything will be okay, you just have to exert a little more patience and determination. It'll happen for you, i just know it!
Alicia, I usually read my "people I'm secretly stalking" blogs in order, yours is at the bottom of my list-today I clicked on it first- Please email me at atestnny@gmail.com
I am so sorry that everything in your life has been really rough for quite some time now. That IS really stupid they threw your application out for being off by 1.3 wpm. I guess they have to make "rules" somewhere though. I just hope that you find a new job really really soon. I hate it that you are so miserable lately, and just want you to find peace and happiness with your life again. I pray for that for you! I hope you can have an ok weekend! Hang in there!
Oh, I am so sorry. I worked for the school dept in Maine and we didn't have a wpm test. We had a skill proficiency test. That's much better to tell a person's experience than her wpm. I'm the same way, under pressure can't type fast at all.
I hope that you find the perfect match very soon!
thats ridiculous!!!!!! 1.3 words short and they ditch you without even another look....wow!
i am so sorry the search isnt working out (i am there too) and there has to be a reason that this didnt pan out - something better on the horizon for you, i just know it.
Now, that is beyond frustrating!!! How rediculous that they'd not even LOOK at your resume just because you didn't pass the typing test. Seriously!
I'm so sorry you're struggling with this! I wish I could make you feel all better! (((hugs)))
oh my gosh, how terribly dissapointing!! I am so so sorry. keep looking. Try monster. I got my perfect (haha - better anyway!) job through monster, they called me! try it out, and also try all of the other ones you can find online. good luck!
Definitely ridiculous that you lost out on that job for a measly 1.3WPM. I do know that God's timing is perfect - it's just so difficult sometimes when you want something to come in your time, I know - trust me, I do.
I'm praying for you.
I prayed for you this morning. I know I'm late on reading this, but I wanted you to know I"m thinking about you. You're right- our God does have a plan. I look forward to seeing what it is.
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